“It weighs about ten pounds. It’s soft and squirmy. It must want something, because it’s screaming, and you better be good at guessing, because it can’t tell you what it wants. If it were anything else, you’d take it back to the store and exchange it for one that works. But instead, you’re expected to love it.”Author Jeff Vogel did not go into parenthood with any delusions. He knew that he would love his daughter, and that was terrifying. What if he screwed up? And he knew that life with a baby would be different, that it would be filled with an endless stream of filthy diapers, unexplained wailing, and sleepless nights. Not to mention no sex. The parenting books painted a picture of smart, communicative babies and mindless, limitless joy, but he knew they were lying to him.

So he wrote his own book. The Poo Bomb: True Tales of Parental Terror recounts, in a no-punches-pulled style, the first year of life of Cordelia, Jeff’s freshly hatched, gooey human girl. The first year of parenthood isn’t about joy or fulfillment. It is about menial labor, wiping up human waste, and marking time until the kid is old enough to run and play and thank you for its life. Jeff chronicles the journey through the morass of year one week by week.

Rich with irreverent honesty and humor, The Poo Bomb is the reality show of parenting books: It reflects what most parents have sometimes guiltily felt about their not-so-delightful bundles of joy.